the following events took place late one night many years ago in Tucson Arizona:
So I went to the Wal-Mart one late night back in college, which was a very typical activity for me. I had just finished loading up my groceries into my Jeep Wrangler (man I miss that vehicle) and was not feeling well so I headed back inside to grab a Sprite in hopes to settle my stomach. As I'm walking back the follow proceed to occur:
Stranger - "Hey man do you have an change?"
Me - (pat's pockets) "no man sorry I don't have any change."
Stranger - (in a bit more stern voice) "No Man, I don't think you understand, DO YOU have any change"
It's at this point that I go to turn around to tell this bum that I don't have any change, that I'm a poor college student who just spent WAY too much money on ramen noodle and Dr. Peppers. But when I turn around to face this guy all I see is a big black barrel as this guy proceeds to show me the business end of his pistol. I have no idea what caliber it is I just know it's big and black and with that I don't say a word. I look at the guy and give him my best "dude you've got to be kidding look". He then proceeds to tilt the gun "gangster" style and gives me the "does this really look like I'm kidding" look.
I slowly reach into my back pocket and pull out my wallet. Which was a wallet my grandfather had given me. The velcro barely kept it together and even though I swore I could still smell the pipe tobacco many told me it was long gone. It was my most prized possession as he had recently passed away and this was really all I "had" of him. I didn't want to give it up but at the same time I wasn't ready to see him again.
After I handed over my wallet they guy smiles and just said "Good boy, now just stay there, don't move, don't say anything and everything will be cool". So I did just that. I stood there, I did nothing. I didn't run away and duck behind a car, I didn't scream bloody murder, I just stood there. I had just been robbed, mugged, violated.
From that point forward every homeless man I came across was that mugger. I'd purposely walk on the other side of the street if I thought I'd bump into one. I'd make sure to look straight ahead and not make eye contact as they panned on the street corners. If ever asked for change I wouldn't even respond, I'd just silently speed up my walk and ignore them.
Many of you do this same thing today and you've probably never been mugged. You see a man or woman on the side of the street, or in a park, or just hanging around and you avoid them. Sure every once in awhile you'll give them a couple of bucks, maybe even donate some clothes or other possessions to Goodwill or the Salvation Army. But you still look down on them. You still fear them in some way, or simple feel disgusted by them.
Then again maybe you don't but let me ask you this. When was the last time you truly did something for someone less fortunate then yourself without thinking, without expecting something in return, or without thinking that you just earned some points with God?
I've gotten over my fear. I've started to tear down my stereo types. I'm not perfect and I still digress back to my old ways but I'm trying. I try to have cash on me "just in case" but not for parking, or a pack of gum. Nope I try to have it just in case someone else needs it. I also make eye contact now with people, I smile, I say how are you or what's up. I treat them as I would anyone else I know. I treat them as people.
Yes I still get fearful.
Yes I still have negative thoughts about "them".
Yes I am trying to make a difference.
Apr 25, 2008 at 3:47 PM Amazing story!
The first thing I thought of when he asked "no, DO YOU have..." was not about money but about change in the figurative sense - I've been thinking about change allot lately. Looks like you had more 'change' after the mugging than you did before, eh?
Apr 28, 2008 at 9:54 PM More would be an understatement. :) And really it's been a reawakening of lost thoughts, ideals and beliefs. A very welcomed reawakening at that!